Turning the calendar and entering a new year always feels like a fresh start or a blank canvas to me. The new year offers a chance to make adjustments like no other time of the year. But, be careful, making too big of a commitment can lead to a quick February failure. Let’s take a look at a few things to consider as you ponder how to seize this opportunity to visualize and create a new picture with the supplies sitting right in front of you.
Start by thinking of 2020 as your very own, personal, blank canvas. Or, if you prefer, visualize this opportunity as a freshly fallen blanket of snow or a sandy beach as the ocean recedes from high tide to low. Regardless of the way you think about it, it’s untouched and is waiting for you to cast an imprint. The trick is that you should not just jump right in and mess it up, but you also don’t want to linger too long. Ponder it a bit and start to create something new.
I have my own things I am contemplating as I enter the new year. When I start thinking about things, I like to journal and write about those thoughts and visions. The blank page allows my thoughts to meander and associate freely. Today, my thoughts coalesce around the beauty and opportunity available from a fresh, new blanket of snow. When the snow falls and starts to cover the ground, I am taken by the beauty. Everything is softly covered in white powder. It’s so undisturbed that it is practically calling you to come out and make an impression.
That’s where I am at right now. Before I take that first step into the snow, whether it be to shovel it or hike through it, I want to think about it for a few moments. Those first couple of steps are critical. Everything else builds off of them. I am pondering how I am going to take those same first steps into 2020, which also happens to be the beginning of a new decade. Feel free to follow along as I contemplate how I will take those steps onto the blank canvas of the new year.
Start with What You’ve Been Trying to Cover Up
What are you hoping the snow covers up? When I look out at my backyard, I see hibernating plants, a hole in the lawn or dead clumps of grass. I wouldn’t mind any of that getting covered up by a snowstorm. That doesn’t mean, however, that those items are going away. They are just forgotten until the snow disappears. As soon as spring hits, these unsightly areas will reappear and start to grow.
This is the reason I want to focus here. I cannot continue to cover things up and hope they go away. These are clearly things I need to address, and I am not talking about moles and weeds. As I think about starting fresh, I begin by focusing on the things in my life that I have been avoiding. Why? Because these are hard to change, easy to avoid and deep-seated in my psyche.
For me, that something to avoid is a social anxiety disorder. I have worked around it for years. It was terrible when I was in my teens and I partied my way around it during my college years and my early 20s. Luckily, I met some great people, in particular, my wife, and they have helped me navigate the challenges since that time.
Until the last year or so, that is. Being jobless has allowed a number of things to sprout and start growing again for me. For starters, it showed me how much I am still trying to cover up and never really addressed. Networking and job-seeking require awkward moments and putting yourself out there with new people and strangers, not to mention mixers and other social events. I do not do these things very well and it is very uncomfortable. Constantly trying to meet new people and reaching out for help has been challenging.
Technology makes it easier to avoid these interactions, but it does not make them more effective. The best manner to connect and to network is in person, many times at awkward social events. I have put myself into some of these situations, but I need to do more. I know there are some I have been outright avoiding. If I want to improve, I need to take on those challenges.
Thankfully, I have been able to meet fantastic new people. As you may have read in previous articles, I have ventured into new experiences, although many have been solitary adventures. I have made strides reaching out to strangers and acquaintances to build my network. This is progress, but I need to do better. My steps on the blank canvas of 2020 will focus on overcoming more of my social anxieties.
Set Realistic Goals
Now, you can visualize the bigger picture you want to create for your life. As you work to get started, figure out how far you want to go in a reasonable amount of time. Too many improvements or developmental plans fail under their own weight. People tend to bite off more than they can chew and digest. I do it all of the time and I consider myself to be pragmatic.
Determine what you can tackle in a short period of time, like weeks or a month instead of a much longer block of time. Don’t over challenge things with a huge goal covering a whole year. Instead, think about what you can do this week or the next couple of weeks. For me, what opportunities are already on the calendar that I can attack differently? Or, what have I been avoiding that I can muster the strength to tackle in the next 10 days?
Setting smaller, more reasonable goals allows you to improve and gain confidence by seeing results. Sustained results are achieved by adjusting behaviors and sticking with the changes until positive results are realized. Big plans require intensive energy and we are expecting to see quick, dramatic results. Focus on doing things the right way seeking small, incremental improvements for the best willpower.
For my social networking goals, I continue to push myself to meet several new contacts each week. I focus on implementing behaviors and making small improvements designed to get me past my hangups. At the same time, I know I need to push past my fears and create a new comfort zone. If I try to do too much too quickly, my anxiety will push back and send me hurtling toward failure. Seeing steady progress and accomplishing realistic goals keeps me going and improving.
Plan Your Strokes Carefully
Beyond a snowstorm, I enjoy thinking about a new opportunity like starting to paint or draw onto a fresh piece of canvas. Once you have your focus or muse, visualize where to start and the subjects you want to paint. In your head, you paint freely and perfectly. In particular, concentrate on the first couple of strokes you are going to use to hit the paper. Allow your thoughts to meander from those initial strokes and build into something wonderful and great.
Press yourself to think about the things in your life that you have felt uncomfortable to address. Think about areas in your life where you may have already conquered those issues. For me, I have successfully overcome social anxiety issues in the workplace. Being completely focused on achieving a mission by working with a team of people pushes my anxieties to the background. Helping customers and thinking about their needs subdues my hangups. The purpose of work provides the environment I need to override my issues.
Knowing this, how do I translate that mindset into other areas of my life? As I think about the next couple of months, I use those ideas to thematically place my strokes onto the blank canvas. I really want to concentrate on applying the same mindset to my challenges. Accessing the commonalities between where I have been successful and where I have failed points me in the direction to go. I do not need to get there all at once. It’s going to take time. What I do need to, however, is get started.
Start Painting
Identifying your purpose and where you need to apply it next is the critical element to get started. Purpose drives your willingness to do things that are uncomfortable. Regardless of how difficult the challenge may seem, you know doing those things will make yourself better. The key is forcing yourself to make those first brush strokes and start taking on those challenges. Accomplishing simple, starter goals paves the way to face more uncomfortable and awkward situations.
My purpose of helping people, taking care of family, and personal development drive my actions. When I am at work, I forget about my anxieties and I am comfortable putting me in front of people. The worries about looking stupid or the focus on caring about what people think fades to the background.
As I work on this year’s blank canvas, I want to apply the same mentality to eliminate anxiety from other places in my life. Whether it involves getting up in the morning, making an uncomfortable phone call, or keeping going when I have an awkward moment, drawing back on my vision and my successful experiences creates a backstop. Let it happen and then keep painting that beautiful vision you have for your future.
These ideas will drive my actions for 2020. Instead of allowing circumstances to dictate how I act or create anxiety for me, I intend to control the situation. Only I can determine what will end up on the canvas. Something will end up on the canvas for my life for this next year. I prefer to work and put the strokes on there myself with the support of my people.
What Makes This Time of Year Different?
I know I cannot accomplish these things in my life without focus, work, and support. Beyond all of that, it’s imperative to take time to be introspective. It’s difficult to make a fresh start without dealing with the challenges and obstacles you have been working so hard to cover up. Otherwise, you are dealing with the symptoms and never addressing the cause of the problem.
Once you have your muse, frame and layout how you want to make the changes. Through this part of the process, think about the places in your life where you feel they may best be applied. Focus on one or two areas or activities. You cannot change everything at once. Overstated goals lead to failure while focused, reasonably sized goals encourage success. You can always expand your scope later.
Finally, timing is everything. You can do this any time of the year, but what makes the New Year different is that feeling and mindset of beginning with a blank canvas. Put your past failures behind you and forget about them. It doesn’t matter if you have tried once or thirteen other times, this could be the time it works. That is what it means to be starting clean. The score is 0-0 and the game has just begun.